The Best Tip When Working With Challenging Students

I am going to be honest. Many of us, no, wait, all of us who teach have worked with students we don’t necessarily like all the time. I know that is harsh, but it is true. Of course, we love them and want what is best for them, but some days some students just get under our skin.

Under Our Skin

There is a strange phenomenon that happens with these “under-our-skin” students, they can invade over our mental space. It is not uncommon to find oneself thinking about these students far more than any other students in class. I have had just 3 students, in a class of 36, who exhibit off-task or inappropriate behavior and I catch myself obsessing over them. I have found myself thinking of them on my way to school in the morning about how I will deal with their behavior in class. During class I am focused on managing their behavior. Even on your way home, if I am not careful, I am once again thinking about them.

I have the privilege of working with educators around the country and this pattern repeats itself. Teachers, if we are not careful, spend a significant amount of mental currency on those students who present the most challenging behavior. We are responsible to devote as much time, energy, creativity, and stamina as possible to engage all students. But we must be mindful to address all students in class. From my experience, over time, we can break through to our toughest students. Until that relationship is developed I have a strategy that can change interactions with the most challenging students.

Wheat and Weeds

My secret is found in the parable of the wheat and the weeds. In this fable a farmer experiences an enemy throw seeds of weeds in his pasture. Instead of having the seeds removed, he lets the crop and the weeds coexist. Our classrooms are our fields and if we follow this analogy, teachers are the farmers. In every class there is wheat and weeds, that is just a fact. The secret your focus as an educator.

I am not suggesting that students should be referred to as weeds. Rather, on-task and off-task behavior is the wheat and weeds, respectively. In the same way a farmer looks out over a field, educators look out at their students. If an individual, or group of students, routinely exhibits challenging behavior, we are presented with choice. Which behavior to focus on, the wheat or the weeds. I can easily fall into the trap of focusing solely on the weeds. When I do, I am more likely to get angry and carry that negative energy into class each day. However, when I conscientiously strive to focus on the wheat in class, the narrative changes. When I do, I bring a positive intention to class, and I find a renewed vigor to connect with my students exhibiting challenging behavior. It makes all the difference.

Focus On The Wheat

If you are struggling with a tough class or a challenging student, I invite you to unabashedly focus on the wheat. Take a few minutes, each day before school, to think of the students who are striving. This practice, which has become a meditation for me, has been transformational. I you commit to this, I promise that you will walk into school each day with a lighter spirit and a smile on your face; and it won’t be fake. You will see the wheat, which has been there the all along. You will also discover that you have a greater capacity to engage with your students who are exhibiting challenging behavior, who are may be most in need of your attention.

Be well,

Mitch